Zachary Saunders 6-13-1982 - 7-9-2009
Welcome back, we're glad you're here!
I lost a friend yesterday. I don’t really know how to deal with it so I’m having a go at it the way he might have. I’m thinking and letting the thoughts flow straight from my brain and out of my fingers onto my keyboard.
Zach was a writer. A way better writer than me, if I’m honest and hell, might as well be. He had a way of grabbing people with his words both in person and on paper. He could talk just about anyone into just about anything and he often did. He wasn’t above trading on his good looks and winning smile to get what he wanted, but no one ever minded because what he wanted always seemed to turn out to be a hell of a good time for everyone he’d suckered into it. Zach was charming.
I met Zach when I moved from South Georgia to the Buford area, which is about forty five minutes outside of Atlanta. We were both in the second grade, and we were weird little kids. We eventually got taller, or at least Zach did, but I think we’ve stayed consistently weird. On the subject of height, and the lack thereof, he’s about the only person in the world who could call me leprechaun, pixie, and other names that basically boiled down to - oh my god you’re a teeney tiny, without me assaulting them with intent to perform serious bodily harm. I did mention that he was charming.
We finished up elementary school, and went on to the same middle school, and then the same high school. We took weird little smart kid classes, participated in the Future Problem Solvers of America program. At some point Zach drew half of a picture titled “Snake Valley” whose centerpiece was a guy getting squeezed by a boa constrictor. I finished the other half, and it resides in a box with some of my most precious things. We had classes together and apart, agitated for a drama club in the eighth grade, were thespians in high school. Zach, with his mom, who is an amazing and classy lady, sent me flowers and a card when my grandfather died.
One of my best memories ever is an afternoon that I spent with Zach and three of our other friends, Sarah, John, and Drew. We walked through the green, humid woods, hung out at Sarah’s and watched movies in the cool air conditioned house when night fell. I’ve tried to write that day perfectly at least fifty times but I can never capture it.
After high school we lost touch for a while. I worked, got married, bought a house, got divorced, and moved around. Zach went to college, wrote, studied, partied, and got sick - cancer. I can’t say that he never complained, but he never complained to me, apart from a mention or two about how the meds sometimes made him queasy. He showed off his impressive surgical scars, and made up tall tales about how he’d gotten them. Some of the stories involved velociraptors.
Zach loved Star Wars, books, music, Firefly, and good beer. He liked Jack Kerouac and looked at me disapprovingly when I remained willfully ignorant of one of his favorite authors, Hunter S. Thompson. If he didn’t love the Celtic punk rock and filk music that I insisted he listen to, he faked it well enough that I couldn’t tell the difference. As for me and his many, many other friends, we loved some or all or none of those things, but we all loved Zach.
Zach’s passing has left an aching void in a lot of people, but his presence in our lives was more than worth the price. So, do me a favor. Love your friends extra hard today. Call them and let them know that you’re doing it. And if you have a couple of dollars burning up in your pocket, lob them at the American Cancer Society’s Relay for Life if there’s an event in your area.
You can read a sample of Zach’s writing by clicking here. Lonely Night In Gainesville
Zach - I’m going to miss your wit, your wicked smile, and seeing your face. Love you, thank you for everything.
– Bonnie
Zachary Saunders 6-13-1982 - 7-9-2009
July 11th, 2009 at 12:02 pm
That was great. I couldn’t have said it better myself, it’s times like these that I wish I had talent…
July 11th, 2009 at 4:15 pm
So sorry Bonnie…
July 12th, 2009 at 11:11 am
That was great, well said. Good sentiment and he would have been proud.
July 14th, 2009 at 12:02 pm
I am so sorry to hear about your loss, however I am so glad to see you recounting so many positive experiences you’ve shared with this person. It seems they will always live on in your fond memories
July 16th, 2009 at 8:58 am
Bonnie, I am so sorry for your loss. He seems like a very special person and it’s a great loss to the world that he died so young. Thanks for sharing him with us.
July 21st, 2009 at 9:21 am
Thank you Bonnie! He was my cousin. Although we were close when we were young, I don’t know very much about what he has done or the person he became in the last 15 years. It was good and hard this past weekend to hear & tell stories about him. You are right….love your friends extra and don’t put it off…if there is someone out there that you were close to and you have lost touch… don’t wait.
August 3rd, 2009 at 12:38 am
It hurts so much to lose someone you were close to–even though you have positive memories of that person. Be kind to yourself during your grieving time. However long that is–it’s different for everyone. Thank you for writing about him, and that’s a good picture you posted. A face to go with the name.